“My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.”
~Dalai Lama
So you may remember from last week’s post that I was ranting quite freely about my failure as a peace lovin’ mama. I dropped enough F-bombs in that blog to express my sincere frustration with myself and the situation.
I’m happy to say that, truly, the low points of our lives, those times when we fuck up, really can be profound turning points.
If we take the time to reflect, we can always use what we’ve learned from our feelings to forge a new path.
Last week I felt discord, melancholy, and utter despair over not being the kind of mama I want to be and not treating my daughter the way I want to treat her.
This week, I’ve used those emotions to get really clear about what it is I do want.
I want to model for my daughter how to be calm, cool, and collected during times of challenge.
I want to embody a steadfast kindness that permeates every interaction with my daughters.
I want to express my heated emotions, like anger or frustration, in a respectful, clear way.
I want to show my daughters that I am learning and growing and ever becoming more the woman I want to be.
And every day is a beautiful opportunity for me to continue practicing.
Today, I want to tell you another story, one about choice and tenderness and compassion…
It was somewhere around 8a. My girls and I were preparing for our day ahead, ready for the fun and activities we had planned.
As I am cruising around the house gathering items we’d need to take along, I notice that Juls and Bela are playing rather aggressively. And within moments, I hear the shrill cries of angst and discord coming from our living room.
My first thought: We’ve gotta get going! Ahh, can’t they just get along?
My second thought: Wait. Slow down. You know you can choose more kindness and patience. How can I guide them with kindness to treat each other more lovingly?
Though I felt kind of rushed, I chose to let it go. Instead, I chose to take my time and practice compassion, kindness, love.
Embracing the moment, I sat myself down on the bottom step of our staircase and asked for my girls to come next to me and take my hands in theirs.
This took a few moments. I focused on my breath, on choosing to be patient. I waited. They came.
We were all there together. In a circle, holding hands, looking at one another, being present.
Just getting to this point felt pretty frickin’ fabulous. I felt like I had achieved something magical to let go of the rush and embrace a simple stillness and unity.
I looked at each of my girls and expressed my love for them. I got a demure smile from each of them in return.
We continued holding hands.
I tapped in to my heart and shared with them my hope for us to treat each other with loving kindness.
I reminded my daughters that we are all in this together…and that we love one another.
Wholehearted smiles and I love yous flowed from each of them.
We embraced in the tenderest and most powerful group hug.
I felt so free and happy.
Next thing I know, my girls are hugging and kissing each other and as I continue readying us for our day, I see Juls holding Bela.
A few minutes later, I asked Bela to help clean up the playroom and guess what happened?
A miracle of sorts.
Juls, of her own accord, walked right into the playroom and started cleaning up the toys that Bela had been playing with…and soon, Bela was there next to her sis helping too!
My heart overflows just remembering these moments. Such an ordinary day, transformed into something extraordinary because I took the time to act with love and kindness.
I chose love and love chose me.
We always have the chance to turn everything around…sometimes all it takes is the willingness to be open to possibility.
A little dose of compassion can transform us.
Compassion, tenderness, kindness, love.
This is what it’s all about. BEing the person we desire to be.
When we let love guide our days, we fill our lives with joy.
So tell us, how have you noticed love, kindness, and compassion transforming your life?
I always appreciate reading your insight and learning with you!
Thank you for being here, beautiful.
Here’s to Compassion, Kindness, and so much LOVE,
Denise
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